“Sorry!” – Are you apologizing too much?  Sorry is no longer the hardest word! Although Elton John might disagree, sorry is actually one of the most over used and misused words in the English language.

Merriam Webster defines sorry as feeling sorrow or regret and goes on to state that it’s used to express polite regret or sad or disappointing news in a polite way. But just what are we all sorry for? And what have we done that we regret?

Traditionally people only said they were sorry when they hurt someone’s feelings unintentionally or did something bad or uncalled for. Today, sorry is even used when people want to pass by another person while walking, accidentally bump in to another person, or even shuffle past others seated in a crowded movie theatre row.

Although it may seem polite to say sorry for disturbing others in a movie theatre, passing by someone on the street or accidentally running in to someone the more appropriate term would be “excuse me”. This way you’re not apologizing but asking the other person to excuse your behavior which he/me might find cumbersome.

“Excuse me” seems to be a dying phrase today, as many people assume sorry and excuse me are interchangeable. The truth is they’re not. So why should you care? Sorry is easier to say than excuse me anyway, right? Yes, but people judge and form impressions about you based on how you speak and the words you use. For example saying sorry for everything will give the impression that you are : a push over, subservient, unprofessional and subordinate; when you may think saying sorry gives the impression that you are polite and considerate.

In your professional life, apologizing (saying sorry) too much can demonstrate self-doubt and a lack of confidence in your skills and abilities. The last thing professionals want is to be perceived as being insecure or unsure of their own abilities. Bosses look for employees who are self-assured and confident in their skills and expertise, not someone who expresses constant regret for his or her actions.

So when should you use sorry and when should you use excuse me? As a rule of thumb only use sorry when you have given offense, and avoid saying “sorry” on its own, say “I’m sorry” instead, this shows that you regret what you have done.

Use “Excuse me” when you :
- pass someone while walking
- move through a crowd
- accidentally cut someone off
- need to leave a meeting or the dinner table
- sneeze or cough in public

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